The love you want depends on this…
Finding a love relationship that satisfies your soul (or growing your marriage into one) is directly related to your ability to embrace yourself just as you are.
When you love and accept all parts of you - your nerdy parts, your sensitive parts, your artistic parts, your intelligent parts, even your physical body…
You become magnetic.
You become irresistible.
You begin to notice your heart open, lifting your relationship to a new level of intimacy.
Or if you’re single, you find that your energy captures the attention of high-caliber, potential partners.
In order to find more comfort in your own skin, you must drop the “not enough” feeling that secretly inhabits your mind and body.
Feeling deep down like you’re “not enough” makes you doubt yourself at every turn.
“Not-enoughness” can lead to ruminating about small things, like whether to wear jeans or dress pants to work, what colour to paint your bathroom, or what salad to make for the family BBQ.
It can affect the bigger things too, like continuing to date a person even though you know in your heart they’re not right for you.
You completely ignore your own intuition, even when it’s yelling into your ear with a megaphone, “he’s NOT good for you!”
Here’s what the not-enoughness cycle looks like:
Trying to be what you think others want you to be rather than who you are
Avoiding making big decisions because you don’t trust your intuition
Getting mad at yourself for not being ‘better at life’
Feeling underneath like you just don’t measure up no matter what you try
Then, for lots of people, the body starts to become inflamed or chronically tired.
In the end, your energy is wasted on trying to avoid feeling lonely, rejected, imperfect, and like a “failure”.
What’s worse is that no one really knows how you feel because you smile when you’re with your friends, you come home to your beautiful condo, you pay all of your bills no problem…
… heck you even have a dog that everyone at the dog park loves!
In most cases, this cycle is a result of not feeling seen, heard, and accepted for who you are in your early life.
This cycle doesn’t have to rule your life anymore.
If you want to experience the love you've always dreamed of, releasing the pain and loneliness from your childhood will get you there.
LOVE that wraps you in a BIG HUG when things go off the rails, like your beloved dog dies, or when someone in your family gets a devastating diagnosis.
LOVE that makes the simple things more enjoyable like walking in your neighbourhood when the leaves change colour, or watching Game of Thrones on the couch for the second (okay, third) time.
All because you decided it was time to let go of the fear of “not enough,” and move into a future of self-love and acceptance.
You will never feel alone again when you’re safe to be your true self.
You will always feel loved when you know how to love yourself fully.
When you process the trauma of feeling misunderstood and dismissed, you liberate yourself from the subconscious story that keeps you feeling like you aren't enough and stuck in isolation.
Your beautiful, imperfect, wonderful self will feel like home.
This connection with yourself is the only way to a deeper connection with others.
If you’re ready to step into a bigger version of yourself and release your not-enoughness, so you too can attract the love you truly want, book an exploration call with me to see if an Accelerated EMDR Psychotherapy program is right for you.
I'd love to support you to be the bravest, most open-hearted version of yourself, so you can always feel love and acceptance, no matter where you are or with whom!
Email me at therapy@andreaskitch.com to get started on your love journey.
